Isolation addiction
Dear Diary

Isolation: A New Segregation

Isolation can have a lot of different meanings.

One is the lack of company, in the sense; when you are completely alone, this kind of isolation is common and usually not harmful unless forced upon someone.

The Second type of isolation is far more dangerous, because this brings alongs other problems such as
depression, suicidal tendencies and in many cases clinical insanity. This type of isolation is a state of mind and usually is independent of the surrounding environment,.

In the sense; when a person feels the most intense form of loneliness even though they are surrounded by people who are willing to socialize with them, this kind of isolation takes a strong toll on the person, often
causing social awkwardness.

This state of mind usually occurs when someone has lost a loved one or gone through severe emotional trauma. Here is a story dedicated to the people going through this; you are not alone.

ADDICTION

26/2/2017

Dear Diary,

It’s dark here, almost as though my loneliness has grown so dense that it has manifested itself into darkness. No matter how hard I try, the idea of socialization has merely become a pleasant distant memory, something that i should be missing but I think being alone in a dark room has become an addiction. This place has become my temple, a place to get away from all worldly sorrow and
pain. I use to think that i would find solitude here. But what loneliness does is; it makes you think; it makes you remember. Your mind becomes a machine, pumping ideas; digging up old memories; making you remember your mistakes.

My mind wandered, my childhood came to light, the smell of wet soil; the greenery; the hills; the house, the sweet aroma of flowers, the buzzing of insects , the blue sky, the sun shyly hiding away between the clouds. The next memory came along, my mothers face; smiling, so pure, so divine.

I opened my eyes, but why did i feel like they were still shut? has the darkness blinded me?, has the loneliness taken away my sight, does it matter…I am slowly shutting down now, i can feel the sleeping pills slowly flowing into my blood stream, I hope I took enough.

I realized that hiding can keep me from sorrow, but it is the isolation that i want to run away from, I have realized that my mind only recalls pleasant memories to put a curtain of happiness over my eyes, when in reality, I am alone. I am a being of flesh but no soul; hallow. Nearly insane. The only escape is darkness; it’s like a drug, small doses aren’t enough, closing my eye’s forever might help…

By: Yianna Joy

Instagram Handle: @yianna_joy

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